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Let me tell you a story about scary Ned
Scariest guy to ever wet a bed He had hands on his arms and eyes on his head But they weren`t his He`d go down to the market and try to scare the fish He said that they bothered him, they weren`t his favorite dish Then he`d go down to the highway and pretend that he was dead That just the way he was, creepy scary Ned Ooohh oohhhhh Scary Ned Ned loved Halloween cuz he didn`t need a mask He`d steal the children`s candy, he didn`t even ask He`d sit right down in front of them and then he`d start to eat He`d tell them they were better off cuz that stuff can rot your teeth Ooohh oohhhhh ooohh oohhhhh Scary Ned A strange glow would come from his place late into the night He`d watch T.V. `til the dawn, you know that ain`t right If he started to get tired he`d rub sauerkraut on his head That`s just the kind of guy he was, good old scary Ned Ooohh oohhhhh ooohh oohhhhh ooohh oohhhhh Scary Ned He had a face his mother didn`t love When people saw on the street they often said "Uughh!" Sometimes late at night he`d walk alone He`d be reciting stuff Bad sounding stuff Icky awful stuff But when you got to know him, he weren`t so bad Ooohh oohhhhh Scary Ned Ooohh oohhhhh ooohh oohhhhh ooohh oohhhhh Scary Ned Ooohh oohhhhh Scary Ned [this repeats to end over talking- K] He`s pretty scary Scary Ned Really scary Scary Ned He`s scary Hence the name Scary Ned I saw him yesterday He said "Hi" I got scared `Cause he`s Scary Ned If he weren`t scary I supposed he`d be called Like, Happy Ned And who wants to hear a song about Happy Ned (Happy Ned)
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