Текст (слова) песни: Bette Midler - Otto Titsling

"This next story is a true story.
It concerns two of my favorite subjects:
industrial theft . . . and-a t-ts!
Mmm, what a combo! This is the story . . .
The inventor of the modern foundation garment
that we women wear today was a German scientist
and opera lover by the name of Otto Titsling!
This is a true story.
His name was Otto Titsling.
What happened to Otto Titsling shouldn`t happen to a schnauzer.
It`s a very sad story. I feel I have to share it with you."

Otto Titsling, inventor and kraut,
had nothing to get very worked up about.
His inventions were failures, his future seemed bleak.
He fled to the opera at least twice a week.

One night at the opera he saw an Aida
who`s t-ts were so big they would often impede her.
Bug-eyed he watched her fall into the pit,
done in by the weight of those terrible t-ts.

Oh, my god! There she blows!
Aerodynamically this bitch was a mess.
Otto eyeballed the diva lying comatose amongst the reeds,
and he suddenly felt the fire of inspiration
flood his soul. He knew what he had to do!
He ran back to his workshop
where he futzed and futzed and futzed.

For Otto Titsling had found his quest:
to lift and mold the female breast;
to point the small ones to the sky;
to keep the big ones high and dry!

Every night he`d sweat and snort
searching for the right support.
He tried some string and paper clips.
Hey! He even tried his own two lips!

Well, he stitched and he slaved
and he slaved and he stitched
until finally one night, in the wee hours of morning,
Otto arose from his workbench triumphant.
Yes! He had invented the worlds first
over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder. Hooray!

Exhausted but ecstatic he ran
down the street to the diva`s house
bearing the prototype in his hot little hand.
Now, the diva did not want to try the darn thing on.
But, after many initial misgivings,
she finally did.
And the sigh of relief that issued forth
from the diva`s mouth
was so loud that it was mistaken by some
to be the early onset of the Siroccan Winds
which would often roll through the Schwarzwald
with a vengeance!
Ahhhhh-i!

But little did Otto know,
at the moment of his greatest triumph,
lurking under the diva`s bed
was none other than the very worst
of the French patent thieves,
Philippe DeBrassiere.
And Phil was watching the scene
with a great deal of interest!

Later that night, while our Brun Hilda slept,
into the wardrobe Philippe softly crept.
He fumbled through knickers and corsets galore,
`til he found Otto`s titsling and he ran out the door.

Crying, "Oh, my god! What joy! What bliss!
I`m gonna make me a million from this!
Every woman in the world will wanna buy one.
I can have all the goods manufactured in Taiwan."

"Oh, thank you!"

The result of this swindle is pointedly clear:
Do you buy a titsling or do you buy a brassiere?

"Ohhh! Thank you!"

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Меню » Главная » Музыка » Правила » В избранное	Музыка RU: 0-9 А Б В Г Д Е Ж З И К Л М Н О П Р С Т У Ф Х Ц Ч Ш Щ Э Ю Я EN: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z Текст (слова) песни: Bette Midler - Otto Titsling "This next story is a true story. It concerns two of my favorite subjects: industrial theft . . . and-a t-ts! Mmm, what a combo! This is the story . . . The inventor of the modern foundation garment that we women wear today was a German scientist and opera lover by the name of Otto Titsling! This is a true story. His name was Otto Titsling. What happened to Otto Titsling shouldn`t happen to a schnauzer. It`s a very sad story. I feel I have to share it with you." Otto Titsling, inventor and kraut, had nothing to get very worked up about. His inventions were failures, his future seemed bleak. He fled to the opera at least twice a week. One night at the opera he saw an Aida who`s t-ts were so big they would often impede her. Bug-eyed he watched her fall into the pit, done in by the weight of those terrible t-ts. Oh, my god! There she blows! Aerodynamically this bitch was a mess. Otto eyeballed the diva lying comatose amongst the reeds, and he suddenly felt the fire of inspiration flood his soul. He knew what he had to do! He ran back to his workshop where he futzed and futzed and futzed. For Otto Titsling had found his quest: to lift and mold the female breast; to point the small ones to the sky; to keep the big ones high and dry! Every night he`d sweat and snort searching for the right support. He tried some string and paper clips. Hey! He even tried his own two lips! Well, he stitched and he slaved and he slaved and he stitched until finally one night, in the wee hours of morning, Otto arose from his workbench triumphant. Yes! He had invented the worlds first over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder. Hooray! Exhausted but ecstatic he ran down the street to the diva`s house bearing the prototype in his hot little hand. Now, the diva did not want to try the darn thing on. But, after many initial misgivings, she finally did. And the sigh of relief that issued forth from the diva`s mouth was so loud that it was mistaken by some to be the early onset of the Siroccan Winds which would often roll through the Schwarzwald with a vengeance! Ahhhhh-i! But little did Otto know, at the moment of his greatest triumph, lurking under the diva`s bed was none other than the very worst of the French patent thieves, Philippe DeBrassiere. And Phil was watching the scene with a great deal of interest! Later that night, while our Brun Hilda slept, into the wardrobe Philippe softly crept. He fumbled through knickers and corsets galore, `til he found Otto`s titsling and he ran out the door. Crying, "Oh, my god! What joy! What bliss! I`m gonna make me a million from this! Every woman in the world will wanna buy one. I can have all the goods manufactured in Taiwan." "Oh, thank you!" The result of this swindle is pointedly clear: Do you buy a titsling or do you buy a brassiere? "Ohhh! Thank you!" Нравится песня? Расскажи о ней друзьям: Прямая ссылка на текст песни Otto Titsling: http://musworld.ru/music/eng/101/1/7257.html Все тексты песен: Bette Midler » Bette Midler - When A Man Loves A Woman » Bette Midler - Hang on in There Baby » Bette Midler - Baby Its Cold Outside » Bette Midler - You Dont Know Me » Bette Midler - Song Of Bernadette » Bette Midler - Dreamland » Bette Midler - Married Men » Bette Midler - Mr Goldstone » Bette Midler - Birds » Bette Midler - You Cant Always Get What You Want » Bette Midler - To Comfort You » Bette Midler - Old Cape Cod » Bette Midler - Rain » Bette Midler - I Remember You » Bette Midler - Say Goodbye To Hollywood » Bette Midler - Hurry On Down » Bette Midler - Cradle Days » Bette Midler - Leader Of The Pack » Bette Midler - Whose Side Are You On? » Bette Midler - My One True Friend Рекомендуем скачать: » Николай Старченков - Август » Наиль Хазинов - Став листком среди листьев, травинкой меж трав... » Наталья Тарвердян - Горошина » Николай Шипилов - Война и Мiр » Наташа Королева - Бриллианты слез » Новелла Матвеева - Дорожная » Новелла Матвеева - Дома без крыш (Окраина) » Ночные Снайперы - Liest Viel » Настя Полева - 10 стрел » Ноль, Федор Чистяков - Блуждающий биоробот » Ночные Снайперы - Я не знаю кто ты » Николай Шипилов - Клоуну Александру Шелковникову » Николай Шипилов - Ля-ля-ля » Николай Старченков - (Стихи) » Новелла Матвеева - Там, где кончается город... » Ногу Свело! - Клязьма » Николай Алексеев - В тебе живет сто женщин сразу... » Николай Шипилов - Поминки в Каменном карьере » Наталия Бутенко - Ухожу » Николай Старченков - Позови (Стихи)
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