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He lives down by the furnace Janitor, Janitor And he makes the young kids nervous Janitor, Janitor He tells everybody to call him Tony But he smells like oil, and his ass is bony Janitor, Janitor He`s got a lot of charms Janitor, Janitor Like the prison tattoos on his arms Janitor, Janitor He cleans the bathroom and tells dirty jokes He dresses like a woman and rolls his own smokes He`s the Janitor, Janitor He`s the Janitor, Janitor Hey there Neil, how ya doin` Hey, not too bad. Hey, I guess I saw you talkin` to the janitor this morning Well, strange thing...I went in early, eh, to practice my volleyball spike in the gym and he was buffin` the floor with that electronic, buffomatic floor waxing thing he`s got, eh? And so I was trying to spike, eh, and he was tryin` to buff all around me as I was tryin` to spike, and I said, "Hey pal, I`m tryin` to concentrate, Mr. Janitor, and I wanna work on my spike." And he said, "Oh yeah?" And he dressed up like Kate Smith and touched himself on the leg with a big wooden spoon and then he waxed me so hard I felt the hairs givin` way on myself, and then I make a little kind of oven mitt with what I could put back together. How`s your spike now? Brilliant! I guess it would be. Hey Neils! Neil! Neils! Neils! Neil alert! I was talkin` to the Janitor this mornin` too, ya know. Ohhhh.. Yeah, he took me down, he took me down behind the furnace Oh really? And he showed me that sausage collection that he`s got. I heard he only has one. Yeah, but it`s real pretty. One day I wanna be like him Janitor, Janitor Masturbating as I clean the gym Janitor, Janitor I think it must be a really nice life Cleaning your nails with a hunting knife Being stained yellow, the rest of your life. Janitor, Janitor
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