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I can barely feel the sheets with all these crumbs down in my bed How can I get to sleep with all this buzzin in my head And whod have ever thought Id not complain about a mess Servers me right I guess This is what I get For eatin crackers with my gin And drinkin in my sunday dress The telephone is by the bottle, which is always by my bed From time to time I give it a rattle to make sure that its not dead I will wait here for your call till I run out of cigarettes I love to play the part of the damsel in distress Flickin ashes in my coffee Drinkin in my sunday dress Well Ive been on the road to this and Ive been on the way to this But whod athink itd come to this Dont let on youve seem me like this My old transistors sounding just as twangy as a fender My radiator growls like elvis after sunday dinner Ive drained my last tequila and Ive thrown away the blender Ive poured out all the wine From how on nothin but the best Cognac and pasty cline while drinkin in my sunday dress Well Ive been on the road to this and Ive been on the way to this I surely aint a hypocrite Ive had my fun and now I must confess Our reverend is a kingly soul Repents em on a dime His Bible is not inked in gold Hes not the cheatin kind One sunday after meetin I was in the greetin line He said Ive seen you from the altar Gulpin down communion wine Just remember whos beside you When its no business of mine
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