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I`m a Very Important Person I park in the V.I.P And when I go to the bathroom, i go in the V.I.P toilet And when I wanna change a lightbulb, I don`t do it myself... Oooohhh no... I have a technician Cause I`m a V.I.P I`m a V.I.P I`m a V.I.P I`m a V.I.P Now, as I began to become a V.I.P, i forgot what i`ve become a V.I.P for I began to grow accustomed to people saying "Right this way sir...drinks are on the house..." Flight attendants on airplanes saying : "Please...Really, I don`t wanna bother you sir, but it`s such a pleasure to have you on board. May I have your autograph for my daughter ?" "Yeah baby right after I go to the toilet I i`ll give you a couple of`em Cause i`m a V.I.P!" Now,one thing about V.I.P is,is they never seem to be alone Ooohh no ! The "true" V.I.P must travel with an entourage ! People who say "Right on boss" Cause it`s a V.I.P! Right on boss I`m a V.I.P! As i began to realise that i had gained V.I.P status, worries began to creep in What if one day,i woke up,and i was no longer a V.I.P ? No more good tables at the restaurants... No more strange women smiling and approaching me on the streets... No more top notch booty No more entourage to say "Right boss" I began to have nightmares And in my nightmares, I was just a fucking nobody. Laying at the beach, imagining myself being a VIP ! Just like i was before... Hearing the applause in my head Beautiful warm embraces of superior members of the female gender... V.I.P V.I.P Of course, when one becomes a V.I.P, One meets other V.I.Ps At social occasions... And one inevitably thinks : "thck ! How shallow and crass these people are ! They`re not down to earth and real like me... Oooohhh no ! I`m a very special V.I.P" Another interesting phenomenon, associated with V.I.P celebrityhood, is the "V.I.P reflection effect", during which anyone associated with the V.I.P, becomes a sort of V.I.P in their own right ! Such as "son OF the V.I.P", "guitar player FOR the V.I.P", "girlfriend WITH the V.I.P", "accountants of the V.I.P" The maid, the dog, the music publisher ...huh ! All enjoy a sort of `reflected glory`, as in.. "Hi this is Nastea I work for Iggy And i`d like 6 tables tonight in the V.I.P section And he needs passes for everyone And free drinks of course In the V.I.P area" Right on boss Cause i`m a V.I.P. It`s also true that when one is a V.I.P, everybody`s happy to see you... All the time ! And there`s an implicit rule that a V.I.P must never- never Be on a barn. Cause everybody expects YOU to make their day And they`re all be on to you if you`re in a bad mood. They will "thck!tchk!tchk ! mur mur mur mur mur!", And you will find yourself with the wrong kind of attention: A "difficult" V.I.P. Psychologists tell us that a sense of self-esteem Is so necessary in today`s world. As a V.I.P, I can guarantee you, you`ll never be alone. You`ll never be alone. Cause you`re a V.I.P!
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