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JOANNE Mark? MARK Hi. JOANNE I told her not to call you MARK That`s Maureen But can I help since I`m here JOANNE I hired and engineer. . . MARK Great! Well, nice to have met you JOANNE Wait! She`s three hours late The samples won`t delay But the cable - MARK There`s another way Say something - Anything JOANNE Test - One, two, three. . . MARK Anything but that JOANNE This is weird MARK It`s weird JOANNE Very weird MARK Fuckin` weird JOANNE I`m so mad That I don`t know what to do Fighting with microphones Freezing down to my bones And to top it all off I`m with you MARK Feel like going insane? Got a fire in your brain? And you`re thinking of drinking gasoline? JOANNE As a matter of fact - MARK Honey, I know the act It`s called, the `Tango Maureen` The Tango Maureen It`s a dark, dizzy merry-go-round As she keeps you dangling JOANNE You`re wrong MARK Your heart she is mangling JOANNE It`s different with me MARK And you toss and you turn `Cause her cold eyes can burn Yet you yearn and you churn and rebound JOANNE I think I know what you mean BOTH The Tango Maureen MARK Has she ever Pouted her lips And called you `Pookie` JOANNE Never MARK Have you ever doubted a kiss or two? JOANNE This is spooky Did you swoon When she walked through the door? MARK Every time - so be cautious JOANNE Did she moon over other boys--? MARK More than moon-- JOANNE I`m getting nauseous MARK It`s hard to do this backwards. JOANNE You should try it in heels! She cheated MARK She cheated JOANNE Maureen cheated MARK Fuckin` cheated JOANNE I`m defeated I should give up right now MARK Gotta loko on the bright side With all of your might JOANNE I`d fall for her still anyhow BOTH When you`re dancing her dance You don`t stand a chance Her grip of romance Makes you fall MARK So you think, `might as well` JOANNE `Dance the Tango to Hell` BOTH `At least I`ll have Tangoed at all` The tango Maureen Gotta dance til your diva is through You pretend to believe her Cause in the end - you can`t leave her But the end it wil come Still you have to play dumb Til you`re glum and you bum And turn blue MARK Why do we love when she`s mean? JOANNE And she can be so obscene MARK Try the mike JOANNE My Maureen (een, een, een. . .) MARK Patched JOANNE Thanks MARK You know - I feel great now! JOANNE I feel lousy BOTH The Tango: Maureen!
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