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Mom and dad are goin` out for the evening
And you`re stuck inside the house all alone That`s when you decide it might be fun to harrass someone Dial a random number up on your telephone You ask if their refrigerator is running Then you tell `em they should go out and catch it Buddy, if they ever figured out where you were callin` `em from They`d come and bust your head right in with a ratchet Listen to me Don`t go makin` phony calls Please stick to the seven-digit numbers you`re used to I know that you think it`s funny drivin` folks right up the wall But it`s really gettin` old fast Little Melvin has a natural obsession Askin` for Prince Albert in a can He gets a kick each time he makes a collect call To some guy he doesn`t know who lives in Japan He`s callin` strangers up at three in the morning Gives `em pizza pie delivery at four He won`t be laughin` when they`re tracin his line One day the phone police will be there at his door Yo, hear me Don`t go makin` phoney calls Only dial the seven-digit numbers you`re used to Swear someday I`m gonna yank that phone cord right out from the wall How long is this phase gonna last? Come on [Moe :] Moe`s Taverne - Where the elite meet to drink. [Bart:] Uh, yeah, hello, is Mike there? Last name Rotch. [Moe :] Hold on; I`ll check. [Moe :] My crotch! My crotch! Hey, has anybody seen my crotch lately? [others laughing] [Moe :] Listen to me, you little puke. [Moe :] One of these days, I`m gonna catch you [Moe :] And I`m gonna carve my name on your back with an icepick! [Bart laughing] Don`t go makin` phoney calls Only dial the seven-digit numbers you`re used to You went through the New Yourk City phone book and prank-called `em all Hope that you grow out of this fast Grow out of this fast... Don`t go makin` phoney calls Only dial the seven-digit numbers you`re used to But you think it`s funny drivin` folks right up the wall But it`s really gettin` old fast
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