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One night me and the crew hit the road on a mission
To slurp free brew and go fuzzy flounder fishin` Kayjees on the hi-fi and the keg was bottomless Until we brought Skip O` Pot2mus And Daddy`s gonna get some probably underage and dumb And everybody knows that the Daddy eats his young Lupus in the lavatory making a big stink Macing up the toilet seat and pooping in the sink M.S.G.`s tanked up and wizzin` in a cup Waiting for a sprinkle genie to come and drink it up Cause I`m the one bottle willy with the 12 Horse Ale After that I get silly like Soupy Sales Now it`s midnight and I`m completely boofy blitzed A six of Shlitz and the Jew brew Manischewitz With my beer-tinted glasses I`m ready to bitty battle I`m Hungry Like The Wolf but I`ll end up tending cattle Cause you`re pretty when I`m drunk (You`re pretty when I`m drunk) You`re pretty when I`m drunk (You`re pretty when I`m drunk) You`re pretty when I`m drunk (You`re pretty when I`m drunk) You`re pretty when I`m drunk (and I`m pretty fuckin` drunk) Here she comes, a funky fried cutie Mr. Jimmy Pop Ali is gonna get some booty Cause I`m Mr. McFeelie with a speedy delivery You`d think I was a ditch the way this chick was diggin` me But maybe I should check and see if this is where I wanna be Hey Lupus is she cute? Yea for a pygmie Aw! What do you know? You`re probably going home alone And it wouldn`t be the first time that I gave a dog a bone Plus beauty, it`s only skin deep It`s in the eye of the beholder and my beholder`s about to tweak I could tap that barrel, in fact I know I can It`s a msnags a trois you and me and Heineken Cause you`re pretty when I`m drunk (You`re pretty when I`m drunk) You`re pretty when I`m drunk (You`re pretty when I`m drunk) You`re pretty when I`m drunk (You`re pretty when I`m drunk) You`re pretty when I`m drunk (and I`m pretty fuckin` drunk) Regrets I`ve had a few First and foremost I`d like to mention you For the sake of conversation we`ll call you the Brand New Heavy Your a mix between an Ugnaut and Eugene Levy You can call it big-boned, I prefer to call it gut You`re Buddha you`re Shamu you`re Jabba the fuckin` Hutt You had harpoon scars and your boobies were hairy I smelt tuna melt but I wasn`t gonna worry It was 3 A.M. and I wasn`t gettin` squat So I rolled you up in flour and aimed it for the wet spot I was buttering rolls like a soup kitchen Christian Then it hit me something bit me while my little rod was fishin` I was deep sea fishing I took a fat chance But how was i supposed to know that Jabberjaws lived in your pants At that junction I came to realize That only Frank Purdue likes thighs that size Fatty fatty boom ba latty I gotta lament That you were not a girl you were an experiment Cause you`re pretty when I`m drunk (You`re pretty when I`m drunk) You`re pretty when I`m drunk (You`re pretty when I`m drunk) You`re pretty when I`m drunk (You`re pretty when I`m drunk) You`re pretty when I`m drunk (and I`m pretty fuckin` drunk)
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