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He`s got the bonhomie of a game show host And his handshake is so limp it`s like meeting a ghost His apologies are tired cos he uses them a lot His excuses are so lame if they were horses they`d be shot He lies through his teeth with impeccable grammar In the game of life he`s just a dreadful goalhanger Keeping all his options open till the very last minute Checking every situation trying to work out what`s in it Trying to pin him down is like nailing water to a wall He`s incapable of making a commitment at all Like trying in a nail with an inflatable hammer In the game of life he`s just a dreadful goalhanger Yesterday upon the stair I met a man who`s never there He won`t be there again today Well, that`s what he told me to say He`s got the natural arrogance of an exclamation mark And he wishes his bite was as big as his bark He`s appealing to the referee at every single stage He`s a fuzzy little bundle of impotent rage And where he ought to have patience, he only has anger In the game of life he`s just a dreadful goalhanger He has a lack of humility defies imagination And he hangs round like a fart in a Russian space station He doesn`t even notice as he sells you down the river Cos he`s one of life`s takers and he`s looking for a giver He smirks and shrugs his shoulders as he drops another clanger In the game of life he`s just a dreadful goalhanger
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