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I have 36 expressions Sweet as pie and tough as leather And that`s six expressions more Than all them Barrymores put together Instead of just kicking me Why don`t they give me a lift Well, it must be a plot `Cause they`re scared that I got such a gift Well I`m miffed `Cause I`m the greatest star I am by far But no one knows it Wait, they`re gonna hear a voice A silver flute They`ll cheer each toot ( Yeah, she`s terrific!) When I expose it! Now can`t you see to look at me That I`m a natural Camille As Camille I just feel, I have so much to offer (Hey listen kid I know I`d be divine because ...) I`m a natural cougher [coughing sounds] Some ain`t got it, not a lump I`m a great big clump of talent! Laugh, they`ll bend in half (Did you ever hear that story about the traveling salesman?) A thousand jokes (Stick around for the chokes) A thousand faces, I reiterate When you`re gifted Than you`re gifted These are facts I got no ax to grind He, what are you blind? In all the world so far, I`m the greatest star No autographs please [spoken] Do you thing beautiful girls are gonna stay in style forever What if I say not, any minute now there` gonna be out Finished than it`ll be my turn [sung] Who is the pip with pizazz? Who is all ginger and jazz? Who is as glamorous as? Who`s an American beauty rose, With an American beauty nose, And ten American beauty toes, Eyes on the target and wham One shot one gunshot and bam? He mister Keeney here I am I`m the greatest star I am by far but no one knows it! That`s why I was born I blow my horn Till someone blows it I`ll light up like a light Right up like a light I`ll flicker, then flare up, ah, ah! All the world`s gonna stare up Looking down you`ll never see me Try the sky `cause that`ll be me! I can make them cry I can make them sigh Some day they`ll clamor for my drama Have you guessed yet, who`s the best yet? If you ain`t I`ll tell you one more time You bet yer last dime In all of the world so far I am the greatest, greatest star!
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