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Hey kids, listen up if you want to be sick `Cause your dinner looks like something from a Cronenburg flick Think twice before you cuss and shout "damn damn damn" Let me tell you a story about green eggs and ham. There was a little yellow man called Sam-I-Am That`s me! I don`t like you, Sam-I-Am Well, that`s fine, that`s cool, I understand But do you like green eggs and ham? I don`t like green eggs and ham No, I don`t like `em, Sam-I-Am Would you like them here or there? I wouldn`t like them anywhere `Cause I do not like them, Sam-I-Am No, I don`t like green eggs and ham Would you like them in a house? Would you like them with a mouse? Maybe you can`t hear, you got something in your ear? No I`m gonna make this perfectly clear I would not like them in a house, I would not like them with a mouse I would not like them here or there, I wouldn`t like them anywhere `Cause I do not like them, Sam-I-Am, No, not for me, green eggs and ham Would you like them if I served them to you in a box Candlelight, wine and a bottle of scotch? Yeah, some soft lighting, soft music, maybe some Fred Penner on the blaster... Not in a box with a fox or a house with a mouse Stop bugging me, you louse! I would not eat them, no, man, I don`t like your green eggs and ham Well, would you could you in a car, eat them, don`t deny who you are He`s gonna like them, you`re gonna see You might like them up in a tree No, not in a tree, not in a car, would you let me be No fox no box no house no mouse, not here, there, or anywhere `Cause you guessed it, I don`t like green eggs and ham I don`t like `em, Sam-I-Am A train, a train, a train, a train! Would you, could you in a train Or up in an aeroplane? How `bout in the dark? We could drive and park We could listen to the crickets and the pit bulls bark No, not in a plane, not in the dark, not on a train, not in a car, not up a tree `Cause I don`t like `em, Sam, see, Not in a schoolhouse or a shoebox with a house-mouse or a red fox Not here, there, and everywhere Didn`t even like the Beatles with their long, long hair. Hey! You lay off the Beatles, buddy! ... Well, you don`t like green eggs and ham Oh, Mr. Perception, Sam-I-Am Well I know that you`d like `em if you ate `em with a goat! I would not could not with a goat Well would you could you on a boat I would not could not on a boat And I will not ever with a goat I`m not interested in stuffing face in the rain, on a train, I should introduce you to my friend pain Not in the dark, not up a tree, Not on your fine china with Earl Grey Tea No boxes, foxes, houses, mouses, husbands and wives - no spouses! Why you trying to make me eat that? I don`t like it, I wouldn`t serve it to my cat I said already, I don`t like them, Sam-I-Am, I do not like green eggs ham! Mr. Cheese! You just think you don`t like them, so you say And he`s beginning to remind me of Doris Day You say you don`t like this and you don`t like that Well you`re starting to sound like a finicky cat Just try them, try them, and you may find you like nothing better than Two greenish eggs over easy in the fry-pan And to accompany this fine taste we have Martian ham - pork from space! Now Sam, if you get out of my face I`ll try that and puke all over the place (good!) Nothing makes a crowd disperse more quick Than a great big puddle of sick! Say...say...not bad, green eggs and ham I believe I like them, Sam-I-Am And I`d eat them in a boat, with a billy goat, I`d eat them in the rain in the dark on a train In a car, up a tree, they`re pretty good, you see So I`d eat them in a box with a fox I`d eat them in a house and with the house-mouse I`d eat them here, I`d eat them there I`d eat them in my Fruit-of-the-Loom underwear I think you`re ok, Sam-I-Am Well, I wouldn`t let you down, you stubborn old man! Hey, we should share them, eh, we got enough ..Are you kidding? I don`t eat that stuff!
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