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I was the kind of kid back in school Who wore a members only jacket, thought he was kool That`s when I met katrina, she was best friends with seshel I thought she was the one, yeah I thought she was special I saw her in the hall about quarter til three I said I`ll take you in my nova, to the tasty freeze She said I know all about you, more than I should I know all about the dirty mags you keep in the woods (chorus) So tell me how I`m supposed to be when I`ve been stalked by a lesbian I can`t sleep a wink, and I`m married to the ephedrine How am I supposed to sleep when I`ve been stalked by a lesbian now Now don`t take it light, it might seem funny to you Yesterday my science project, was covered in glue So I asked that guy seshel, was it something I said He said quit being so fuckin` paranoid, it`s all in your head The way she`s looking at me, I think she wants me to be, The guy that always gets shot in every movie you see Oh god she`s walking this way, oh god what should I say, I hope and pray that one day she`ll be straight (chorus) So I was at a bar the other night and I looked across the room and there`s this girl and she walks up to me and she`s beautiful and she says `Hey, I`m Katrina, dude, remember me?` and I freaked I said `Oh my god I thought you looked familiar` about this time this 400 fucking pound woman walks up with Katrina`s face tattooed on the side of her neck, she comes waddling and says `DON`T FUCK WITH MY GIRL` I looked at Jabba straight in the fucking eye and say `Don`t worry every time I picture Katrina`s face it`s gonna be on the side of your gross, fat-assed, 3 chinned neck` she says `Are you stupid?` I say `No I`m just sober!`** (chorus) And she beat the shit out of him
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