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CHAIRMAN
(spoken) Ladies and gentlemen, brethren and sinners all! I call upon our Goddess of the Virtues to give us her well known rendition of the old school song -- Oom-Pah-Pah! NANCY (spoken) All right, shut up, you lot! A bit of culture now! `Ere we go... (sung) There`s a little ditty They`re singing in the city Espeshly when they`ve been On the gin Or the beer If you`ve got the patience, Your own imaginations Will tell you just exactly what you want to hear... ALL Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah! That`s how it goes, Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah! Ev`ryone knows. NANCY They all suppose what they want to suppose When they hear...oom-pah-pah!! Mister Percy Snodgrass Would often have the odd glass -- But never when he thought anybody could see. Secretly he`d buy it, And drink it on the quiet, And dream he was an Earl Wiv a girl on each knee! CUSTOMERS AND NANCY Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah! That`s how it goes. Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah! Ev`ryone knows... NANCY What is the cause of his red shiny nose? Could it be...oom-pah-pah!? Pretty little Sally Goes walking down the alley, Displays her pretty ankles to all of the men. They could see her garters, But not for free-and-gratis-- An inch or two, and then she knows When to say when! ALL Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah! That`s how it goes. Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah! Ev`ryone knows... NANCY Whether it`s hidden, or whether it shows -- It`s the same...oom-pah-pah! She was from the country, But now she`s up a gum-tree -- She let a feller feed `er, then lead `er along What`s the good o` cryin`? She`s made a bed to lie in She`s glad to bring the coin in, And join in this song! ALL Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah! That`s how it goes! Oom-pah-pah!Oom-pah-pah! Ev`ryone knows. NANCY She is no longer the same blushing rose Ever since ... oom-pah-pah! (spoken) Altogether now! NANCY (sung) There`s a little ditty They`re singing in the city Espeshly when they`ve been On the gin Or the beer If you`ve got the patience, Your own imaginations Will tell you just exactly what you want to hear... COMPANY Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah! That`s how it goes, Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah! Ev`ryone knows. They all suppose what they want to suppose When they hear...oom-pah-pah!! ALL Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah! That`s how it goes, Oom-pah-pah! Oom-pah-pah! Ev`ryone knows. NANCY They all suppose what they want to suppose When they hear...oom-pah-pah!! ALL Oom-pah-pah!
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