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FAGIN
A man`s got a heart, hasn`t he? Joking apart -- hasn`t he? And tho` I`d be the first one to say that I wasn`t a saint... I`m finding it hard to be really as black as they paint... I`m reviewing the situation Can a fellow be a villain all his life? All the trials and tribulations! Better settle down and get myself a wife. And a wife would cook and sew for me, And come for me, and go for me, The fingers, she will wag at me. The money whe will take me. A misery, she`ll make from me... ...I think I`d better thing it out again! A wife you can keep, anyway I`d rather sleep, anyway. Left without anyone in the world, And I`m starting from now So "how to win friends and to influence people" --So how? I`m reviewing the situation, I must quickly look up ev`ryone I know. Titled people -- with a station -- Who can help me make a real impressive show! I will own a suite at Claridges, And run a fleet of carriages, And wave at all the duchesses With friendliness, as much as is Befitting of my new estate... "Good morrow to you, magistrate!" Oh gawd! ...I think I`d better think it out again. So where shall I go -- somebody? Who do I know? Nobody! All my dearest companions Have always been villains and thieves... So at my time of life I should start turning over new leaves...? I`m reviewing the situation. If you want to eat -- you`ve got to earn a bob! Is it such a humiliation For a robber to perform an honest job? So a job I`m getting, possibly, I wonder who my boss`ll be? I wonder if he`ll take to me...? What bonuses he`l make to me...? I`ll start at eight and finish late, At normal rate, and all..but wait! ...I think I`d better think it out again. What happens when I`m seventy? Must come a time...seventy. When you`re old, and it`s cold And who cares if you live or you die, Your one consolation`s the money You may have put by... I`m reviewing the situation. I`m a bad `un and a bad `un I shall stay! You`ll be seeing no transformation, But it`s wrong to be a rogue in ev`ry way. I don`t want nobody hurt for me, Or made to do the dirt for me. This rotten life is not for me. It`s getting far too hot for me. Don`t want no one to rob for me. But who will find a job for me, There is no in between for me But who will change the scene for me? ...I think I`d better think it out again! Hey!
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