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Well, what I like to do on formal occasions like this is to take some of the various types of songs that we all know and presumably love, and, as it were, to kick them when theyre down. I find If you take the various popular song forms to their logical extremes, you can arrive at almost anything from the ridiculous to the obscene, or -- as they say in new york -- sophisticated. Id li Illustrate with several hundred examples for you this evening, first of all, the southern type song about the wonders of the american south. but its always seemed to me that most of these song Lly dont go far enough. the following song, on the other hand, goes too far. its called I wanna go back to dixie. I wanna go back to dixie, Take me back to dear ol dixie, Thats the only lil ol place for lil ol me. Ol times there are not forgotten, Whuppin slaves and sellin cotton, And waitin for the robert e. lee. (it was never there on time.) Ill go back to the swanee, Where pellagra makes you scrawny, And the honeysuckle clutters up the vine I really am a-fixin To go home and start a-mixin Down below that mason-dixon line. Oh, poll tax, how I love ya, how I love ya, My dear old poll tax. Wontcha come with me to alabammy, Back to the arms of my dear ol mammy, Her cookins lousy and her hands are clammy, But what the hell, its home. Yes, for paradise the southland is my nominee. Jes give me a ham hock and a grit of hominy. I wanna go back to dixie I wanna be a dixie pixie And eat cornpone til its comin outta my ears I wanna talk with southern gentlemen And put my white sheet on again, I aint seen one good lynchin in years. The land of the boll weevil, Where the laws are medieval, Is callin me to come and nevermore roam. I wanna go back to the southland, That "yall" and "shet-ma-mouth" land, Be it ever so decadent, Theres no place like home.
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