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I used to think my life was so empty, I used to think life was passing me by. I was just about ready, To curl up and die. But one day I got a visit, From the cable company, They hooked me up, plugged me right in, And now I`ve got cable TV. And so I get to watch... The stock report in Korean, Midget wrestling on channel 3, It costs me fifty bucks a month just to see `em, Yeah, but that`s OK with me.... I got cable TV (cable TV), Cable TV (cable TV), Eighty-three channels of ecstacy, I love my cable TV yeah, Love my cable TV. I got the Siamese Faith Healer`s Network, The news and weather from Peru, I got celebrity hockey, And raquetball channel two. Bug Bunny direct from Atlanta, Mr. Wizard is on at five. I`ve got a satellite dish on the trunk of my car So I can watch MTV while I drive. I`m talking `bout, Real quality programs. The type you just can`t get for free, Now I`m never gonna leave my apartment, Cos there`s just so much for me to see On my cable TV (cable TV), Cable TV (cable TV), Yeah, if you have a problem you know where I`ll be: Watching my cable TV, yeah, Watching my cable TV My friends they`re getting kinda worried, They think I`m turning into some kind of freak. But they`re just jealous, Cos I`ve seen `Porky`s` twenty-seven times this week On my cable TV (cable TV), Cable TV (cable TV), The greatest thing that ever happened to me, I love my cable TV, yeah, I need my cable TV. Can`t live without my cable TV, yeah Watching my cable TV.
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