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Weve been together for so very long But now things are changing, oh I wonder whats wrong? Seems you dont want me around The passion is gone and the flames died down I guess I lost a little bit of self-esteem That time that you made it with the whole hockey team You used to think I was nice Now you tell all your friends that Im the antichrist Oh, why did you disconnect the breaks in my car? That kind of thing is hard to ignore Got a funny feeling you dont love me anymore I knew that we were having problems when You put those piranhas in my bathtub again Youre still the light of my life Oh darling, Im beggin, wont you put down that knife? You know, I even think its kinda cute the way You poison my coffee just a little each day I still remember the way that you laughed When you pushed me down that elevator shaft Oh, if you dont mind me asking, whats this poisonous cobra Doing in my underwear drawer? Sometime I get to thinking you dont love me any more You slammed my face down on the barbecue grill Now my scars are all healing, but my heart never will You set my house on fire You pulled out my chest hairs with an old pair of pliers Oh, you think that Im ugly and you say that Im cheap You shaved off my eyebrows while I was asleep You drilled a hole in my head Then you dumped me in a drainage ditch and left me for dead Oh, you know this really isnt like you at all You never acted this way before Honey, something tells me you dont love me any more, oh no no Got a funny feeling you dont love me anymore (approximately 10 minutes and 2 seconds of silence)
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